In Celebration and Remembrance

October 13, 2019:

Immense sadness and tears.

That is what I had expected to find at a recent gathering of donor and recipient families held at Pensacola Yacht Club. It was my first time attending the annual event, In Celebration and Remembrance, hosted in part by LifeQuest.

“Bring lots of Kleenex,” a friend advised. So I did.

It turns out I didn’t need them. From the first guest speaker to the last, I was filled with hope and humanity. More than anything, I was awestruck by families eager to share intimate details of their loved ones with strangers for the sake of honoring their gifts and saving a life. It was stirring to say the least. Their sense of connection was palpable and complex. The stories they told vividly illustrated lives intertwined through transformation and a meaningful sense of obligation to their organ, eye, and tissue donors.

Pastor Mike Mashburn, director of chaplain services at Select Specialty Hospital in Pensacola, set a bright tone by opening the event with a prayer of promise and a dose of spiritual insight.

“You’re no more like God than when giving,” said Mashburn, who has counseled many donor and recipient families. “More than that, you’re most like God when giving life.”

Guest speaker Katie Walton echoed the sentiment.

Walton described in detail how fate, faith, and a selfless 19-year-old organ door saved her life. Too sick to receive a much-needed liver transplant, her prognosis would get worse before it got better. Jaundiced and weak, she relied on feeding tubes for nourishment and a tracheotomy to breathe. Her kidneys began to fail, and she was eventually placed on life support.

“It became apparent I was going to be there (in the hospital) a long time,” said Walton, who was nearing the end of her fight when a remarkable coincidence occurred. Her health improved at the same time a donor became available.

“I knew instantly I was going to live,” Walton said.

She received the gift of a kidney and a liver.

“I’m the lucky one. I’m a normal human being now. I can do anything I want.”

The same could be said of Nic McIver, who nearly had to have his arm amputated after doctors discovered a golf ball-sized cyst on his wrist at age nine. He was diagnosed with Ewing Sarcoma, a rare form of cancer. McIver underwent a bone transplant at UF Health Shands Hospital and quickly moved on with his life. He even medaled in the 2010 Transplant Games of America, a multi-sport athletic competition for people who have undergone transplantation.

Fast forward 12 years. McIver is a busy man. So much so, he was unable to make it to this year’s celebration event. His mother, Candi Owen-Heaton, came in his place. Under different circumstances, McIver’s absence may have felt like a snub. On this night, it was a victory.

“If it wasn’t for a donor, he would have a prosthetic limb,” Heaton told the audience.

Then she read aloud a personal message from Nic, who was away studying medicine at Florida State University. After graduating, he plans to join the international humanitarian medical organization, Doctors Without Borders.

“It’s his way of giving back,” Heaton said.

At the end of the night, donor families were invited to come forward and pour colored sand into one of three clear glass decanters. The result was a beautiful mosaic of shades symbolic of the donors who poured into others through the gift of life.

One by one, donor names were called as their faces were featured on a big screen. A few family members took the mic to talk about how blessed they felt. Others emphasized the importance of telling friends and family you love them. Some shared advice they had been given. One young lady joked that people often misspelled her mother’s name.

“Just because life keeps going doesn’t mean we forget,” said Daniel Currie, who came to celebrate and remember his son’s life and gifts.